Whos Shoes

When I picked up Tesla Friday at 5 pm, I had to beg John to talk sense into Heather who was refusing to let Tesla wear her sneakers for the weekend.

Why do I have to beg for Tesla to be allowed to wear her sneakers?  Why does Heather have to stand outside my house yelling at me to buy Tesla sneakers if I want her to wear sneakers?

Hey Heather, buy your own fucking house if you want one and get the hell out of mine!

Aren’t Tesla’s shoes, her shoes….or does Heather wear them on the weekends Tesla is with me?

John finally told Heather to let Tesla have her sneakers.  Since when is he the sensible one?

Heather is just John’s bitch…in so many ways.  It’s not like I have to actually write it for people to know this.  By her own actions she shows me, her own children and Tesla what a big, dramatic, bitch she is with all her assholery.

I asked many questions in this blog.  I don’t expect answers.

One, Two….buckle Tesla’s shoe.


Dear John~confusing who?

Letters he nevers learn from

Dear John,

Tesla and I were happy she spent the night last night.  That was so much better than just getting two hours together.  She naturally complained for a little, but I finally got across to her that we will just have to enjoy the time we get.  One overnight wasn’t enough, she wanted more.  It’s  hard to explain to Tesla why she has to live with mostly you (and the gang) when she wants to live with me.  Telling her a judge decided means nada to Tesla.  I might as well tell her the Wizard of Oz decided.

Enjoy your time with Tesla and stop being so damn rigid with your ridiculous, unrealistic rules and schedule.  Your world revolves around yourself.  It’s so obvious, yet you don’t see it.  I know you better than you know yourself.  I even understand why you are the way you are.  I get why you filed for divorce….and don’t start with the cheap bags of pot you bought for me or the diet pills I was taking back in 2008.  Neither are your reason for filing for divorce.  You know it.  I know it and a select number of people know it.  Obviously Heather doesn’t know or doesn’t get it yet.  It all depends on how honest you were with her about the dissolving of our relationship.

So back to this morning and Tesla, what was the big deal about Tesla and I doing her homework before school?  It wasn’t like she asked if I could come inside my home and help do it.  She was fine with bringing it out to the car and writing on a book or the hood of my car.  You and I both know it is very simple homework.  Well, I assume you know but Tesla does say it’s mostly Heather who does homework with her.  We could have done the homework and I would have been on my way.  Tesla would have her homework done with plenty of time before the bus came to spend with you if you so wished.  I saw Heather’s vehicle in the drive so I suppose she could have even had time with Tesla.

Sadly, Tesla had to come outside in tears because you wouldn’t let her do her homework away from the island in the kitchen.  I was confused.  Why can’t she do her homework with me?  What is the big fucking deal this time?  You take such pleasure in telling me what I can and can’t do with my child just because a judge decided that Tesla should continue living in our house.  You thrive on it I swear.  Thank God the stupid signing for Tesla bullshit has ceased.  I never did hear from my lawyer that your lawyer, or even Heather’s lawyer, sent him a damn thing.

That’s ok, eventually you’ll hear from my lawyer.



Things I’ve learned.

1. Heather thinks I’m ugly.  At least that’s what she said.  If she was smart she would have told her friends I was beautiful but John only wanted her.

2.  John likes very personal gifts from Heather’s friends.  And his birthday is almost here again!

3.  John and Heather were announcing they plan on getting married this year.  Wait…where’s my damn divorce first?

4.  John is paying for Heather reverse her tubes so they can have a son.  Hello…fairy tale!

5.  No one has been paying the mortgage.  Shocking.

I can’t even make this stuff up.



Dear Heather ~4:45 PM


Dear Heather,

   Where the hell were you at 4:45?  You had to have left my house with my daughter intentionally.  That or you just didn’t know because John is so busy working he can’t even take time to know where you are going with our child, nor when you will be bringing her back.

    How is it that you have my child while my husband is out of town working.  Not only does Tesla miss spending time with me, she misses soccer or any damn other thing Tesla and I wanted to do.  We would not have chosen to run around where ever you have to go with your children.

     Not answering the phone when I call or text is just ignorant.  John doesn’t know what’s going on. He didn’t know you were leaving with Tesla.  And, it doesn’t surprise him that you don’t answer his call either. 

WTH?  How do I know you didn’t kidnap my child?  I could call the cops and be justified, but I won’t do that to my daughter.  It worries me that you are caring for my child.  This is not right. 

Where is Tesla?


I didn’t check the mail recently

Catching up with the wagon

Here’s why….

I can't imagine the letters at the Post Office are good news.

Dear Wells Fargo…guess  you’re upset about the mortgage and want to take the house.  I don’t blame ya’ll.  I rode on out of there years ago…

with no looking back.

Will Heather use her school loans to pay the mortgage again?  Will John sell more of our martial goods?  What has he sold?  (other than pretty  much everything Heather had)

I saw Heather’s house is up for rent!  Maybe they will move there…

Stay tuned,



Dear Heather~I’m lovin’ it.

Dear Heather,

Trying to talk to you is a joke because you don’t make any sense.  Sorry to tell you, John still loves me.  I know you would like to think otherwise.  I thinks it’s a touch sweet that he still cares so deeply.  Don’t beat yourself up over Heather.  I might have been wife #2 but you are girlfriend…..hmmm #12 or so.  Maybe someday you can believe he loves you.  You claim I’m all about money…I’m all about ending this divorce with fairness.  I didn’t come into this marriage with John empty-handed.  So shut your mouth girlfriend….you only know what he tells you.  You really think he’s going to tell you anything that doesn’t make him sound good?!  Like he’s not going to tell you that he thought I looked cute on Easter.  That would crush you….

I don’t want to talk to you about Tesla’s clothes.  Her father should be supplying her clothes.  You don’t need to buy Tesla clothes.  If you want to pay for something, pay me some rent for living in my house.

I don’t know why you showed up for the last 5 minutes of soccer.  It was over…and when Tesla is upset and telling her father she wants to go with mother, don’t interupt Tesla to say, “You’re going home with us.  We are going to play games and have fun!”  You sound pathetic trying to cheer up a little girl who just wants more time with her mom.

As I have learned from many people, you can’t mind your own business.  Eventually I won’t have to deal with you.  Either when Tesla lives with me or John breaks up with you.  (or you find a reason to break up with him.  I don’t see that happening as you need my house to live in….)

Easter Sunday~It wasn’t Jesus’ drama.

I signed the stupid paper stating John was allowing me to have Tesla from 4 PM on Easter Sunday until soccer tonight.  What I don’t understand is why Tesla couldn’t wear her Easter dress for pictures with Dale and I and then change clothes afterwards.  Nope, Heather said to “go buy your own dress for Tesla!”

The dress was a hand-me-down from one of Heather’s kids.  You know, the kids that are not to talk to me but still do and I have no control over it.

So, instead of just sharing the dress on Tesla’s behalf with everyone on Easter, Heather dressed Tesla in this.  Rabbit tail and all.

John said I have to talk to Heather about clothes.  No matter who I must talk to, why would you put that on Tesla and rubber band them to stay up?  TT wears a size 8….not 16-18.   I was so pissed…. Heather doesn’t want to write me a letter (unless maybe her lawyers do it for her) and doesn’t want a taped meeting.  Here is her message to me on John’s cell.  “when u would like to have a 2 way conversation.  u may call me on the home phone.  heather.”  What home phone Heather?  When I lived there it was 717-244-4949.  Do you consider the office number your home number now?  I don’t want to talk to you Heather, I want John to handle the things that have to do with Tesla.




What do cops know?

Suddenly, my blog has become a hot topic concerning “who knows what about whos past” and “let’s have a judging session here on the Internet for the world to enjoy.”


I know John loves Tesla and I will not deny him time with her when I do get custody.  I’m the opposite of him and he knows it.  He just doesn’t want to share her.  I knew he would do this if he was awarded custody.  Possibly even Tesla knew if she lived with her dad there would be “difficulties” in seeing her mom.

The judge didn’t spell out everything because; John is supposed to have the responsibility to make sure Tesla spends time with her mother.

LaDonna forgets the judge said, “If this were based on attitude Mr. Delauter, you would lose because you have a bad attitude.”  She also said, “Ms. Crider, you are a good mother and I believe you have a good man in Mr. Hollinger.  Mr. Delauter, you are a good father.  This is not about who the better parent is, but where it is best for Tesla to reside.”  (note Heather’s name wasn’t even raised)

Will the judge think it is best for Tesla to reside with John after all this?  We shall see.

John had no response to why Heather was calling me at 10 PM to tell me how she is going to ruin my life.  Heather honey, John is doing just fine on his own.

Heck, the Lower Township Police said, “He’s not trying to ruin your life, he already did.”    Hey cop…you don’t know jackshit.

My life is just starting again.


Seriously…you call me from my old office number?

 Wow…now here is excitement…Heather called.

She has started a lawsuit against me and began listing the reasons why she was going to sue me for everything that I have and didn’t care if I went broke (went broke? I am broke!)….I became bored hearing her voice and asked if she had this in writing…she replied a letter will be sent to your lawyer.  (now her lawyer is sending me letters to sue me for my half of my undecided divorce?) I hung up before she was done with the list.  I’d rather read it than listen to her voice go on and on and on.

WHY? I am talking to her kids.  Wait until she hears about soccer tonight then….tonight John told me I could let the girls come look at my cycle…this at Bria’s request.  She sat with Tesla and I during the drink breaks.  I didn’t make her move her drink.  She came and sat with us.  I could go on…better than fiction!

Wait ……….Is my half of the future divorce what Heather is seeking in a lawsuit?

This is non-fiction and it’s mine.  I can’t make this up!  I texted John to ask if he even knew she called…

Thank God I am a writer.

Thank God for my readers.



Dear John~ so sorry

Letters he never learn from

Dear John,

I am SO sorry Tesla didn’t do her homework paper while she was with me this weekend.  We did practice her math, spelling, writing, cutting, pasting, and reading.  The homework was very basic.  Just X out the pictures that don’t start with J and color the ones that do.  That should take Tesla about 2 minutes.  Remind her to write her name on it as she forgets that regularly than doesn’t get credit for doing her homework.  See….non-crisis resolved, Drama King.

What I don’t get is why you feel the need to drive into the townhouses parking area through the exit to chew me a new ass over a two-minute homework paper.  Don’t you realize if you want to tear me a new ass over a homework paper that Tesla knows she needed to do, that’s fine.  Call me after you get home or email or text message me.  You can record yourself bitching at me if you would like.  That way I’ll get the full-blown message, including your scowls and arm-crossing, hand-waving and of course, that Mickey Mouse voice that pops up every time you are aggravated or excited.  Hell, record Heather rolling her eyes and shaking her head at what a failure I am at caring for Tesla this weekend.  Maybe then you two will see how stupid you look.

Your actions only make Tesla feel bad.  Why?  Because she will feel guilty for waiting to do her homework until after she went back with you.  I told her it was fine, she just had to make sure she did it and put her name on it.  We had a very busy weekend with friends and family.  I’ll blog about it eventually.  I know you don’t care, but we had the most fantastic weekend.  It went to quickly.

Here are a few things Tesla said this weekend:

“I don’t want to call my dad.”

“Dad says I can’t call you sometimes.”

“I won’t see you on Easter because Daddy said no.” (This she said on her own BEFORE I even asked you if we could split Easter and she stay overnight to Monday.”

“Dad said to Heather, “I work all day, I don’t want to have to come home and cook too.”

So maybe instead of flipping out over something that is just not worthy of the drama, focus on what your child is saying.  I know she will get her homework done.  What I don’t is how much longer she will respect you for all the drama you and Heather make.  Heather with her “don’t talk to my kids, my kids aren’t going to Tesla’s birthday party.”  What kind of attitude is that?

What I write on my blog is my opinion and I don’t voice my opinions to Tesla.  You on the other hand, actively force your opinions on Tesla by acting like an immature child and pitching a bitch fit in front of her.  Though you swear you don’t, I know you read my blog as you enjoy quoting me.  I know what I wrote, you don’t have to quote me.

Next time, just bitch to Heather.  She’s the only person who wants to hear your squeaky voice.



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